Why does the universe hate me?

So I just got back hangin' at my friend's dorm across the campus - meaning I had an "interesting" walk back at like 10pm. I got waved at by some guy in a window. I might know him, now that I think about it - but yeah. RANDOM STUFF. Kinda surreal. Anywho - my life was just ruined.

I checked my email for that oh-so-valuable email about the video shoot that I was signed on to help with.

[I totally forgot to post the story here:

There was a TAT meeting on Friday - where we chilled and watched movies and met this guy
OH CLICK MEE!

And yeah.

Afterward I was talking to one of the techers that we call by a first name, and I ended up getting signed up to help with someones capstone [senior movie] and yeah.]

I got the email.

So I opened it - hoping that it would say "MOVED TO NEXT WEEKEND INSTEAD OF THE UPCOMING ONE" because my birthday is on Thursday. The original plan was to go home on Thursday [since I have one class] and party with my friends until Monday or Tuesday - since Tuesday is a furlough day - and yeah. I'm turning 18 so it's a big deal.

But the shoot kinda dampens that...but at least I could BE HOME on my birthday right?
That's all I asked for.

Well, the Universe hates me.

The email said that there's a MANDATORY MEETING on...Thursday. So I could still go home, right? Just go home after, right? No one has meetings really, really late, right?
WRONG
It's at SEVEN PM
ON MY 'EFFING BIRTHDAY

So.

I'm going to be sitting in my dorm room by myself on my eighteenth birthday.
My roomie was gonna take me home on my birthday - since she's going home too.

So...I have a choice.
I can either say "EFF THIS SHIZ" and go home, like 99.99% of all humans would.
I can email and pussy my way out of the meeting - even if it is mandatory and highly recommended.
Or...comes the one that my dad is telling me to do.
Just go for it.

So...career or celebrating my life?
Birthday or career.
Family or career.
My kitty or career.

I pretty much was borderline tears the entire time I was talking to my dad about this. I want to come home...but it would totally 'eff up my chances of ever being called on a capstone again. It would hurt me and my dream career.

I hate my life.
And I hate you, universe.

There is no nicer way to put this..but fuck you, Universe. I'm tired of having the luck of a person who just ran over a gravestone that was made out of mirror and under a ladder with a black cat on top.

I have no idea what I'm going to do.
If I go home I disappoint my dad, and hurt myself.
If I stay, I emotionally hurt myself, but I also am helping myself.

...

Sometimes I wonder if I'm in some giant version of the Sims game, and some fatass kid is getting the giggles at watching my life suck at times.

Or maybe my life is just someone's brainchild and I'm living in a book or TV show.
I bet my life would have high ratings if it were a TV show, book, or ridiculously long movie. No one would believe it is real.

Sometimes it's a curse to have the words, "Only you, Hayley," said to me so often.

I enjoy being my weird self - but I don't want to have to deal with THIS.

...whatever.

Going after something I love shouldn't make me this upset.
I'm starting to debate if it really is worth it. Maybe I should just change my major or just go to a junior college.

Whatever.